Yes

There’s beautiful chaos in this house. 

An hour or two of laughter every night before bedtime. Edwin running around screaming “ya man!” Somebody is always telling Baby Sam to go put on pants. Fervent times of prayer and worship when we come together as a family. Uncle David and Timothy are always worshipping in the living room. When one of our five dogs barks, they all bark, and then Ivan also barks with them. Sick patients that provoke arguments amongst the boys of who is going to have the honor of giving them their bed. Endless hours of football discussion that always seem to go on right under my window. Morris’ cackle as he runs around the house. Bwanika’s ‘no’ is always a ‘yes’ that comes with a joke and a good laugh. The congregation of hungry boys that crowd around the charcoal stove every night before dinner time. The laughter, the arguments, the prayers, and the joyful shouting that comes from this home can be overwhelming - but it’s also life bringing. 

God never asked me to say yes to living in a home with 17 other people. 

I was never asked to agree to being bitten, beaten, and spat on by a 9 year old little boy who lives on the streets. 

He never asked me to say yes to suffering, to being uncomfortable, or to weariness. 

And He has never said, “Mal, you are going to live in Uganda for 18 years. You are going to live in Ggaba for the first 4 years. I’m going to use you to open up a home for former street children. You will see Me bring in 184 children. I will move you out onto a big piece of land where Doors will build a boarding school, a clinic, a church, and have many small businesses throughout the slums. Is that ok with you?” 

He’s never asked me that. 

“Will you live for Me today?” 

“Will you love Me with all you have today?” 

“Will you let Me love you right now?” 

“Will you believe in Me today?”

That’s what He asks of me. He’s never asked me to say “yes!” to some giant, awesome life plan that He has spelled out every minute of that involves glorifying Him with every minute of it. 

Instead He asks me to say “yes!” to glorifying Him every minute by letting Him love me so that I can love and believe in Him and live out an amazing, awesome life plan that I am pretty clueless to, but He leads me through.

I say “yes” to believing in Him, and “doing the works the He does.” (John 14:12) Jesus never started a home for children that were homeless during his three and a half years of ministry. He never started a school for children who were starving and had no education. He never employed women so that they wouldn’t have to prostitute themselves.  He was never so caught up in ministry that He didn’t love. 

He made disciples and He loved. He taught people how to receive their daily bread. 

Our heart at Doors is not about how many children we can get off the street, or how many children we can sponsor out of Namuwongo, or how many women we can help so that they can feed their families. Our heart is discipleship. It is spreading the love of Jesus everywhere we walk. It is teaching every person in our Doors family that God is the giver of everything good and that if we say ‘yes’ to Him that we will have all that we need. That is they left Doors Ministries tomorrow they would still have everything that they need - because they are rooted in the Word and in the love of Christ. 

What God has to give to each woman, man, and child we meet is so much important than what we could ever give physically. Jesus said that the poor would always be with us - that’s why it is important to give something that overcomes poverty - the pure, undefiled love of Jesus Christ and fellowship with the Holy Spirit. We have to say YES to receiving it! 

I say “yes” to being loved by Him and to trusting Him wherever He may lead - even to the ends of this earth! I say ‘yes’ to loving Jesus so that when that street kid bites me and my anger and outrage flare up in my heart and hateful eyes look back at me wanting to see my anger and hate, the only emotions these children are used to, my anger and outrage are squashed in my heart and God’s love and forgiveness are seen. 

We are quick to make our life plans. We like to seek out the whole picture to see if it sounds good and exciting to us. We often don’t reach God’s promises for us because we are too busy trying to compromise with God because we think we know what is best for us. 

I don’t want to miss out on a single moment with God, not a single blessing, not a single encounter with Him, not a single place where He wants me to walk with Him. If God had shown me two years ago where I would be right now, I’m not sure that I would have said “yes.” I think I would have wanted to compromise. I would have wanted to know my end date. 

A few weeks ago, a sick friend came and stayed at our house from the slum. She found herself among the middle of our beautiful chaos - screaming, shouting, cackling - and she looked a little overwhelmed. I quickly apologized for the children running around making massive amounts of noise.

“No,” she said, “God has given you well.” 

He has. It didn’t start with a yes to ministry or a life plan. 

It was a yes to being in love with Him. 

It’s been better, harder, and more joyful than I could have ever imagined. 

And it’s only getting started!