4 seconds.

 Jack gave a really good lesson before our day started on the Nile rapids.  Don’t let go of your T-grip, if I say paddle, do it like your life depends on it (because it just might), if I say get down and hold on, do it, and no matter what- don’t panic.  If you go under you will pop up in about 4-10 seconds.  

 I had been rafting a few times before, nothing like the Nile, but I was pretty sure I could handle it. I like adventure, I like outside, I like water,  I can do at least 10 push-ups.  Let’s raft!  My Bear Grills mentality was going strong up until I adjusted my life vest and met our bearded guide Jack who looked like he could wrestle a crocodile while going down a class 6 rapid.  I didn’t have much time to think about how scared I was because after our 10-minute lesson on how to survive the Nile we were off.  Jack informed us that the first rapid was a class 5 and the most dangerous of the day.  

Gulp.  Paddle. Breathe.

We didn’t flip and we all were pretty proud of ourselves.

The next rapid came quickly.  We did everything Jack told us to do.  The wave came as fast and high as the last one.  Before I knew it I didn’t feel the boat under my butt, wait… where is my paddle?... where is the surface?... Oh crap… rocks…it seemed a lot longer than it was.  I had time to ask Jesus to pop me up out of the water, I had time to remember Psalm 27 I read that morning, I had time to remember that Jack was gonna yell at me for not holding on tight enough... then I saw the sun. 

Whew.  I can breathe.

Some ripped rescue kayaker came quickly, and as quickly as it happened I was back with my friends and Jack handing me my paddle. 

God taught me a lot in those 4 seconds.  There have been countless times in Uganda when my fear threatened to overtake my faith, times when I just wasn’t strong enough to hold on, moments when my greatest loves and desires looked me in the face and said “You’re not good enough.”  I always come to the surface, the sun beaming down, and Jesus is right there handing me my paddle, pulling me back in.  Jesus is with me and I am all in to His adventure. 

“The Lord is my light and my salvation- whom shall I fear?  The Lord is the stronghold of my life- of whom shall I be afraid?” –Psalm 27:1